At precisely 10 minutes before midnight, every screen in Halcyon City went black. Traffic lights froze, billboards flickered out, televisions interrupted championship games and late-night dramas alike, and then the angular silver mask of Doctor Calamity appeared against a background of rolling crimson clouds. High above the city, atop the obsidian spire of the abandoned Helix Corporation headquarters, the real Doctor Calamity spread his arms before a machine large enough to occupy the entire penthouse floor.

“Citizens of Halcyon,” he declared, his voice booming from several million speakers at once, “for fifteen years you have laughed at me, imprisoned me, taxed my offshore accounts, and repeatedly described my inventions as ‘needlessly theatrical.’ Tonight, you shall finally understand the cost of your insolence.” Behind him, enormous copper rings began rotating around a glowing sphere of violet energy, while lightning crawled through coils mounted along the ceiling. “At the stroke of midnight, the Dominator Array will activate, and every electronic device in this miserable city shall become obedient to me.”

His chief henchman, Briggs, stood beside a control console wearing body armor, a utility belt, and the exhausted expression of a man who had been employed by supervillains for far too long. “Very good speech, sir,” Briggs said, watching the countdown reach twenty seconds. “Camera three caught the lightning especially well, although I think camera six may have briefly shown the catering table.”

Doctor Calamity lowered his arms. “Camera six did what?” he demanded, then looked toward a terrified technician. “Never mind. There is no time. Briggs, prepare yourself to witness history.”

The countdown reached zero, and Doctor Calamity turned magnificently toward the master console. He placed one black-gloved finger upon the activation key, pressed it, and waited for the great machine to awaken. Instead, the console produced a pleasant chime and displayed a small rectangular box.

WELCOME BACK, DR. CALAMITY. PLEASE ENTER YOUR PASSWORD.

Doctor Calamity stared at it. Briggs stared at it as well, although with considerably less surprise.

“Password,” Doctor Calamity whispered. “Of course. Security.”

“Yes, sir,” Briggs said carefully. “You insisted on password protection after Mister Catastrophe broke into the volcano base and changed all the thermostat settings.”

“That man is a vandal.” Doctor Calamity leaned over the keyboard. “Fortunately, unlike Catastrophe, I possess a functioning intellect. Stand aside.”

He typed CALAMITY and pressed Enter. The console chimed.

INCORRECT PASSWORD. 4 ATTEMPTS REMAINING.

Doctor Calamity frowned. “Naturally. Too obvious.” He typed CALAMITY1, paused, then added an exclamation mark with visible satisfaction.

INCORRECT PASSWORD. 3 ATTEMPTS REMAINING.

Across Halcyon City, millions of citizens continued watching the broadcast. The city’s premier superhero, Solar Sentinel, had already arrived on a neighboring rooftop with his cape snapping in the wind, but even he seemed momentarily uncertain whether intervention was necessary. Police helicopters circled at a respectful distance while Doctor Calamity slowly removed one glove.

“Briggs,” he said, “what was I doing when we installed this console?”

“You had just escaped Blackstone Penitentiary, sir,” Briggs replied. “You were going through what you called your rebirth period. There was a lot of poetry, several capes with standing collars, and you briefly demanded everyone call you Calamity Reborn.”

Doctor Calamity’s eyes widened. “Of course.” He typed CALAMITYREBORN.

INCORRECT PASSWORD. 2 ATTEMPTS REMAINING.

“No,” Doctor Calamity murmured, suddenly pale. “No, no, no. Briggs, this system has a lockout protocol.”

“I remember,” Briggs said. “You said anyone who forgot their own password deserved to be permanently excluded from their own evil infrastructure.”

Doctor Calamity slowly turned toward him. “I was younger then.”

“You installed it eight months ago.”

Outside, Solar Sentinel landed dramatically upon the balcony, shattering several decorative tiles. “Calamity!” he shouted, golden light surrounding his fists. “Step away from the Dominator Array before—”

“NOT NOW!” Doctor Calamity roared.

Solar Sentinel stopped. “Excuse me?”

“I am experiencing a technical issue,” Doctor Calamity snapped. “You may defeat me shortly.”

The hero looked at Briggs, who gave him a small shrug. Solar Sentinel cautiously allowed the light around his fists to fade.

Doctor Calamity paced before the console. “What would I have chosen?” he muttered. “Something intimidating. Something personal. Something no lesser mind could possibly deduce.”

Briggs hesitated. “Sir, there is a ‘forgot password’ link.”

Doctor Calamity froze.

“No.”

“It’s right there.”

“I can see it, Briggs.”

“You could click it.”

Doctor Calamity drew himself upright with wounded dignity. “Doctor Calamity does not click ‘forgot password.’ Doctor Calamity remembers.”

Solar Sentinel folded his arms. “You know, I use a password manager.”

Both villains looked at him.

“What?” the hero said. “Cybersecurity affects everyone.”

Doctor Calamity returned to the keyboard. His fingers hovered over the keys while the entire city watched his humiliation unfold live. Then his expression changed.

“Oh,” he whispered.

Briggs leaned closer. “You remember?”

Doctor Calamity typed very slowly.

MOTHERSBIRTHDAY

He pressed Enter.

INCORRECT PASSWORD. 1 ATTEMPT REMAINING.

Doctor Calamity stared at the screen for several seconds. Then he quietly clicked FORGOT PASSWORD.

A new message appeared.

PASSWORD RESET LINK SENT TO YOUR EMAIL.

Doctor Calamity swallowed. “Briggs.”

“Yes, sir?”

“What is my email password?”

Briggs closed his eyes.